Resilience and Hope Bring Change
Kelly Gerlach - Copper River Basin Child Advocacy Center
April is National Child Abuse Prevention Month! At the Copper River Basin Child Advocacy Center, we have been raising awareness of child-abuse prevention by providing school presentations in Glennallen and Valdez, sponsoring our annual Go Blue Walk, and providing classroom competitions for Go Blue Day in Copper River School District classrooms. One of our goals is to assist families and communities as they seek to give children the skills and support they need to grow into healthy adults.
While our world is settling into a more “normal” post-pandemic life less restricted by lockdowns, we will see the effects of Covid on child abuse and other societal issues for years to come.
Physical abuse of school-aged children tripled during the beginning of the pandemic when many around the world were following stay-at-home orders. Many studies have reported a rise in child abuse during this time. Pediatricians have suspected that Covid-19 and stressors such as isolation and financial worries created the “perfect storm” for abuse.
“Stressful situations can be a trigger for poor judgment and impulsive reactions,” said Dr. Allison Jackson, division chief of the Child and Adolescent Protection Center at Children’s National Hospital in Washington, D.C. “There was a great deal of economic stress, job insecurity and loss of housing potential during this time frame along with the closing of schools, which can be a reprieve for parent and kids.” (Mann, Health Day News, 2021)
People may wonder why this is such a big deal when life around us seems, in some ways, to be getting better. While there are many hopeful solutions to bring hope to families, research shows that untreated abuse and trauma can have life-long effects on children.
Effects on the brain
According to Linda Chamberlain, PhD, MPH, trauma-related symptoms of anxiety, low self-esteem, depression, self-abusive behaviors and temperament issues can permanently alter brain development and can affect a child into adulthood. When children are experiencing any kind of trauma, they frequently use a lower part of the brain (the brainstem and midbrain) that is focused on survival. When in this high alert state, the brain’s energy isn’t focused on learning. Instead, the brain focuses on trying to feel “OK” or “normal.”
Thus, children and adults experiencing trauma can have difficulty with complicated thinking and decision-making. Over time, this can result in smaller brain size, fewer brain connections, difficulty focusing, bullying and other aggressive behaviors. It is a challenge for a child experiencing these symptoms to succeed in the classroom or in other social settings.
On the other hand, when children feel safe and nurtured, they are able to spend more time in the upper part of the brain (the limbic and cortex) where they do their most important cognitive learning as well as form the ability to bond and get along with others. (Chamberlain, The Amazing Brain, 2019)
Resilience
But none of the research on trauma means that children who experience child abuse and trauma are doomed to a life of abuse. Many children work to overcome abuse they have experienced and the poor examples they were given as children. Brains have a remarkable ability to heal and we can rewire and grow our brains over the course of our lives.
When steps are taken to end violent situations, children are often amazingly resilient in their ability to learn to trust and believe that life can be good again. Frequently, the consistent presence of even one positive person in their life (teachers, coaches, youth leaders, mentors, etc.) can be the difference between despair and hope in the life of a child.
Here are some things we all can do to make a difference:
Take care of mental health
Engage in an open, honest dialogue with the children in your lives
Ask children how they are feeling and make time to listen without distractions or judgment.
Demonstrate compassion and kindness
Prioritize mental and physical health by making sure you are getting enough sleep, exercising, spending time in nature and making time for activities that bring you joy.
Model healthy media use
Adults can only expect kids to use their time online wisely if they model this behavior for them. Think about ways to prioritize time away from screens and provide screen free dinners and times in nature where in-person communication is emphasized.
Tell children it’s not their fault
Children tend to blame themselves when bad things happen. Listen, reassure and acknowledge their feelings.
Do “small” things (for parents and caregivers)
Start a chapter book to read with your child
Involve a child in preparing a meal that they will enjoy
Leave your child a friendly note or text
Praise good parenting in your partner and/or a friend (every parent can use encouragement!)
Have a technology-free day—play games, talk, explore, etc.
Enjoy a family game night with your favorite hot drink
Go on a family flashlight walk, sled or star/northern light gazing
Encourage your child to find and help someone in need by shoveling, baking, etc.
When done with intention and consistency, these small, practical life habits can make a large difference in helping children live safe, healthy lives. The individual gifts and preferences of the children in your life may bring to mind many more ideas!
Those who give their time and resources to children may not even realize the seeds of change they are planting in the life of a child by being present, listening without judgment, and keeping their eyes and ears open to who is hurting and how they can provide help. By focusing on resilience and hope, we all can build a bright future for every child and youth in Alaska.
Never underestimate your ability to make a difference in the life of a child!